In our society many people are giving simply because they were taught that giving makes you a good person. This form of giving is fear based! Many people say yes to everything because they want to be liked by all. That is an impossible task! A friend of mine once told me that when you say yes out of obligation, you already know in that moment that you have betrayed yourself. The indirect result is your confidence suffers. For individuals who have made it a habit of pleasing others, I recommend asking yourself these questions: am I simply saying yes because I fear that person’s reaction? Am I putting off my well being by agreeing to this request? Is this request something that this person can accomplish himself/herself? If you instantly feel discomfort in your body when you say yes, this is a sure sign that you are in conflict with your decision. When you genuinely say no to certain demands, you will over time cease to attract people who are taking advantage of others.

If this is someone that you have frequent contact with, you allow this person to take full responsibility for their decisions and choices. Here is a true example: A boss who was continually asking an employee at the end of the day to complete a task first thing in the morning. By agreeing to his request, you reinforced his unreasonable expectations. When you say no, you force him to be better prepared at distributing and organizing assignments and tasks. Now, he has the opportunity to evolve by realizing that his habits and behaviors were responsible for this predicament.

Learning to say NO is not simply about your personal growth! When you take decisions that our truly in alignment with loving and respecting yourself, your life becomes naturally balanced. As well, you compel others to become greater versions of themselves.